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Rick Malm

It will happen. What will you do when it does?

I was six and a half years old and John F Kennedy had been president of the US for just four months when the United States suffered a humiliating military defeat. There was over a year of planning and preparation by some of the finest military minds in the US, including Dwight Eisenhower who led the invasion of Europe during WWII (D-Day).

A US trained and backed team was to land in Cuba and depose Fidel Castro. Compared to D-Day this invasion was a simple weekend party. But within three days they were all either killed or captured.

The finest minds, the most advanced equipment, months of planning, the mighty United States against a tiny island enemy but the Bay of Pigs invasion fell apart and was a total disaster.

Lesson for parents: If well laid plans by great minds can totally fall apart, you’ve got to expect there will be days when your best laid plans explode in your face, too. Continue Reading

January 14, 2016 by

The Results are in! Here are the top 10 from 2015.

In case you missed any of them, here are the posts that you selected as the top ten favorites for 2015.

Thanks for being part of this project to strengthen families this last year. I’ve been amazed by the response and encouragement so many of you have given me. And thanks for sharing these posts with your friends. That’s one really easy way we can work together to help raise up the next generation of committed followers of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Rick Continue Reading

January 11, 2016 by

4 Things we do that make spanking ineffective.

I heard a critic of spanking say, “Spanking is ineffective because it doesn’t change a child’s behavior.” Really? I know it changed my behavior when I was a kid and it changed my kids’ behavior when I was the dad.

But there are four things I’ve observed that actually can make spanking ineffective and counterproductive?

  1. Spanking too often

Spanking is a God-endorsed method of discipline but it shouldn’t be the immediate response every time a child misbehaves. I believe it should be reserved for:

  • A child in open rebellion – he knows what’s expected and willfully chooses to put his will above the will of his parents (or another authority).
  • When a child intentionally injures another person. In this case the punishment fits the crime.

Continue Reading

January 7, 2016 by

I watched a mother preparing her son to be shot.

A Story and Encouragement for parents from John Piper.

I am writing to plead with Christian parents to require obedience of their children. I’m moved to write this by watching young children pay no attention to their parents’ requests, with no consequences. Parents tell a child two or three times to sit or stop and come or go, and after the third disobedience, they laughingly bribe the child. This may or may not get the behavior desired.

Last week, I saw two things that prompted this article. One was the killing of 13-year-old Andy Lopez in Santa Rosa, Calif., by police who thought he was about to shoot them with an assault rifle. It was a toy gun. What made this relevant was that the police said they told the boy two times to drop the gun. Instead he turned it on them. They fired. Continue Reading

January 4, 2016 by

The Mom Song

Happy New Year!

Here’s an amazingly inspirational musical gift to help you start 2016.
May it  be your best parenting year ever.

Listen to:  The Mom Song!

December 31, 2015 by

It’s nice to have good kids but this is more important.

I probably have more Bible knowledge than the average Christian. (I would certainly hope so since I‘ve been teaching the Bible over 40 years.) But here’s something I’ve discovered. Bible knowledge does not equal Christ-likeness. That’s really discouraging to me because if it did I would totally be able to walk on water – especially when it’s below 32 degrees.

But I continually run into people who can’t explain their soteriology or justify their eschatology, they don’t know a homiletic from a hermeneutic but they radiate the love of Jesus in a way that makes me jealous. Continue Reading

December 28, 2015 by

This makes it easy to keep Jesus the focus of Christmas

Here’s a simple 2 minute Bible reading you can share and discuss with the kids. If you have older children – or extraordinarily patient young ones – and want to read/discuss a more complete version I’ll give the passages at the end.

Have a blessed and Merry Christmas!

Luke 2:4-18 
Mary and Joseph traveled from Nazareth to Bethlehem. And while they were there she gave birth to Jesus. She wrapped him snugly and laid him in a manger, because there was no other place for them to stay. Continue Reading

December 24, 2015 by

You can start this simple but powerful family tradition.

Your kids may love to snuggle up around a cozy fire, cups of steaming hot chocolate in hand, sing Silent Night together and then listen with rapt attention as Dad or Mom reads the Christmas story.

Or maybe your kids are more like mine were, “Ah, Dad. Do we have to do that?”
To which I wanted to respond, “No you don’t have to. You get to! Now get in here and listen.”
But I realized such a response wouldn’t promote much peace on earth and goodwill toward Dad – or the Christmas story.

Then we stumbled upon a way to make it a little more interactive, a little more fun. Continue Reading

December 21, 2015 by

3 Myths About Spanking That You Might Believe Are True

I recently released a book entitled Five Times You Should Not Spank Your Child.

 While spanking should be a rare event it definitely is a Biblical tool parents need to keep in their toolbox. It is also definitely a misunderstood parenting topic. Here are three misunderstandings I keep running across.

1- Spanking teaches children that violence is an acceptable way to deal with problems.

I agree that it can imply violence is a way to solve problems if a parent is using it as a way to solve his or her own problem with anger. Then it will likely be a violent act.

But when done properly spanking is not an act of violence. Continue Reading

December 17, 2015 by

3 things I learned from spanking other people’s children

It’s rare that you ever spank someone else’s child but for almost five years I did it regularly. In fact, since it was part of my job, I guess you could say I was a professional spanker. I was principal of a Christian school where any child who received three demerits in one day was sent to my office to be expelled for the rest of the day.

But, when the parents were called to come pick their child up they could ask that the child receive a spanking instead of a suspension. In which case, I pulled out my wicked looking paddle, administered the board of education and the child was sent back to class.

As you might imagine, most parents requested the child be spanked. It was easier on them and, quite frankly, easier on the child, too.

During those five years I learned a lot about spanking children that helped me when I later had to paddle my own. Continue Reading

December 14, 2015 by