It’s rare that you ever spank someone else’s child but for almost five years I did it regularly. In fact, since it was part of my job, I guess you could say I was a professional spanker. I was principal of a Christian school where any child who received three demerits in one day was sent to my office to be expelled for the rest of the day.
But, when the parents were called to come pick their child up they could ask that the child receive a spanking instead of a suspension. In which case, I pulled out my wicked looking paddle, administered the board of education and the child was sent back to class.
As you might imagine, most parents requested the child be spanked. It was easier on them and, quite frankly, easier on the child, too.
During those five years I learned a lot about spanking children that helped me when I later had to paddle my own.
1. I learned to discipline my children early.
The child had done nothing to anger or frustrate me so I could administer the spanking in a calm, thoughtful, even loving way.
Later I found I could also do that with my children if … if I didn’t wait too long. But if I put it off, acted like I didn’t notice or repeatedly threatened them I would build up anger and it became nearly impossible to administer the punishment without anger and frustration.
2. I learned to mourn with my kids over their misbehavior.
I didn’t like spanking them. They didn’t like getting a spanking. I could let them know how sorry I was that they chose to behave the way they did which led to both of us having to do something we didn’t like. And afterward I could paint a picture of hope for a better future.
“I hope this spanking hurt enough that you decide to be obedient the rest of the day so we don’t have to do this again. Wouldn’t it be great if we never had to do this again?”
3. I learned to comfort, love and forgive them immediately afterwards.
Because I wasn’t mad at the child – later at my kids – and was just doing what I had to do because I was the principal – or the dad – I could hug them immediately. Let them cry on my shoulder – I had a lot of shirts with tear and snot stains on the shoulder – and assure them that I loved them and this was all over and forgiven.
I felt these three principles followed the way the Lord disciplines us. It’s done in love not anger. He mourns with us over our sin. He’s ready to embrace us even in the midst of the pain we have inflicted upon ourselves by our sinful behavior.
The Lord disciplines the one he loves and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all.
Hebrews 12:6 – 8
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